Our next franchise reminds me of an old Chris Farley character from Saturday Night Live (Bennett Brauer for those who watch). They’re not “successful.” They don’t make “good decisions.” They shouldn’t be considered a “professional franchise.” They’ve only made eight playoff appearances in 26 seasons, and have the second worst winning percentage in NBA history. However, brighter days are ahead. They’ve acquired the past two number one picks in the NBA draft, both of whom are potential superstars in the making. Ten years from now, the All-Time Minnesota Timberwolves team might look pretty good. Right now, however, they’re a collection of misfit parts, held together by an iconic player who led the team to its only triumphs.
Terrell Brandon had a very short career with the Wolves, but was an effective lead guard for them during that time. He’s joined in the starting backcourt by Wally Szczerbiak, a natural small forward who’ll have to play out of position on this team. Szczerbiak was a deadly shooter in Minnesota, and is one of only five players to have made an all-star team during his time with the club. Szczerbiak will be forced to play out of position because three natural power forwards will start in the frontcourt. Tom Gugliotta was an effective and versatile offensive weapon who was an excellent passer for his size (6’10” 240lb). Kevin Love led the league in rebounds per game in 2011, the year he won the NBA’s Most Improved Player award. Over time, he developed an excellent jump shot that extended past three point range, and was one of the league’s most efficient offensive players. Kevin Garnett is by far the greatest player in franchise history. He led the team to their only eight playoff appearances from 1997 to 2004. He won the only MVP award in franchise history, when he led them to 58 wins and the top seed in the conference, and led the league in total points, total rebounds, rebounds per game, PER, win shares, and win shares per 48 minutes. He’s also one of the greatest defensive players in history, and will singlehandedly make this team competitive on that end of the court.
The bench…is not very good. Part of this is due to the franchise’s youth, and part of it is due to terrible management decisions that have plagued the franchise. Ricky Rubio is one of the worst shooters in NBA history, and he was drafted two slots ahead of one of the best shooters in NBA history. The team tried to sign Joe Smith to an illegal contract, and it cost them four first round draft picks. Other characters include Christian Laettner, who everybody hates, and Nikola Pekovic, who looks exactly like one of the villains from Superman 2. And those are their best reserves! Big minutes will be needed from the starters.
This team was hurt by the four-year requirement, and could use the contributions of Al Jefferson and Stephon Marbury (who were ineligible because they did not play enough seasons with the franchise). They wouldn’t make much difference, however, because this team faces an impossible first-round match up against an historic franchise. Check back in 10 years from now, Wolves fans. Things should be better by then.
Coach: Flip Saunders
All-Time Franchise Winning Percentage (through 2014-15): .393